The way in which we communicate in the Boardroom can absolutely be replicated at home around the kitchen table – compelling communication isn’t exclusive to the corporate world. Here, I share my five secrets to communicating with absolute language mastery: 

1. Set Boundaries

We don’t have to say yes to everything. It may not be practical, it may not be achievable, or it simply may not be the right fit for you. But, we can positively decline, or reframe the narrative. 

Acknowledge what’s been said, future pace your response, then check-in. 

For example, at 3pm, you’re asked to gather some paperwork for the end of the day. 

Your response: ‘Absolutely I understand that you'll need that for the afternoon briefing – I can give it my full attention first thing in the morning and have it on your desk by midday. Does that work for you?’ 



2. Thank for Future Behaviour

In order to encourage an individual to perform to their best, you might choose to thank them for displaying the desired behaviours, and so empower them to do so. 

For example, you have a difficult individual in the Boardroom. Prior to the meeting starting you say ‘thanks so much for coming to the meeting today. I know in the past you've felt less positively about sessions like this, so I just wanted to thank you for your open mind and positivity.'

For this to work well, be aware of your power dynamic and make sure you're meeting them physically. If they’re sat down, you sit down – even the balance and ensure there’s no power play present. 

3. Take Your Space

Typically, women tend to take up less space physically, tend to talk a lot faster and pause much less. Often, they will fill ‘silence’ with paraphrased speech, which risks acting as white noise and disregarding all the power of what’s come before. 

Instead, make a conscious effort to proudly take your place – whether at the Boardroom table, or on a stage – and use the power of the pause. Use hand gestures sparingly, only to make a point.  And when you've stated your point, stop. This absolutely doesn’t have to be aggressive, just be grounded, and allow it to be congruent with your energy. 

4. Be Mindful of Language

Again, women tend to use more modifiers, which are words like ‘quite’. But, these actually work to reduce the impact of what you’ve said and what you’ve done, making it smaller. For example, ‘the project was quite well received’. 

Use these words with caution – unless they’re absolutely necessary, remove them completely. Instead consider using a range of more full and fulsome vocabulary. For example, ‘I am quite tired' could transpose to I'm exhausted, shattered, weary, fatigued. Stand in your power.

5. Your Truth is Not the Truth

Communicate in the way that your conversing partner needs to be communicated with. Often, this isn’t just down to preference, but it’s actually how they process the world around them and the only way that you can ensure that your message has been authentically and completely understood. 

Ultimately, treat language as though it is a living, breathing thing that you must nurture. It’s the vehicle that will allow you to achieve the outcome and output that you most desire. By bringing awareness to yourself and others around these communication insights, you really do have the potential to revolutionise your relationships and communications with others. 

Listen to Felicity chat with Nicola Lowe on the Wisdom for Working Mums Podcast, here: http://wisdomforworkingmums.co.uk/55/.